|
 |
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
| Writing Your Wedding Vows the
Way Poets Do By Chris Simeral Let’s face it, not many of us have the kind of skills or experience to write truly poetic wedding vows. Or do we? Here’s the truth: Even if you don’t know Dylan Thomas from Bob Dylan, and you’re pretty sure T.S. Elliot was that guy who wrote the words to Andrew Lloyd Weber’s “Cats,” all is not lost! In fact, there are ways to learn to write the words you want. With four simple steps, you can take what you feel in your heart and make it come out as sweetly as any Shakespearian sonnet. Step 1: Decide on a theme Finding a theme should arguably be the easiest part of writing poetry for your wedding vows. But you don’t want to be stuck with something trite or cliché, even though the theme of romantic love is probably the oldest known for poetry. There are lots of ways to avoid writing the same old “roses are red, violets are blue” type of poem. One trick the pros use is to envision what a newspaper article about your relationship would say. Would it discuss how and where you met? How your relationship has stayed strong, even during the hard times? What your love has meant to one another? Since newspaper articles get right to the point, this exercise can help you pick out an overriding theme for your vows. Step 2: Allow time for reverie No, not “revelry” (hopefully that will be what your wedding day is all about), but reverie – a quiet time devoted to a kind of dreamy meditation. Try some tricks for allowing yourself time to truly think about your poem -- and not just those things that allow you to “act like a poet.” Go for a walk alone, listen to instrumental music, or simply shut the door to a room in your house and ask not to be disturbed. The most important thing to remember with any of these methods is that you don’t let other people interrupt your time. Step 3: Choose your topic Theme, as discussed above, is the driving idea behind your poem. The topic, however, is the specific vehicle you use to express the theme. While finding the theme should be the easiest part of writing a poem for your wedding, finding a topic that isn’t hackneyed and trite can be a challenge. For instance, love is your theme, but the beauty of your betrothed’s eyes may be the topic. You are using the example of her eyes as the symbol for your love. The key is to find something new. There’s something that makes your chosen one special, be it appearance, wit, or style. That’s the topic you want to choose. Poets use tools like automatic writing, journals, or “dream work” to come up with topics for their prose. (These tools are all discussed in detail in the home-study course I put together for couples personalizing their wedding vows – visit http://www.WeddingVowToolkit.com for more info.) But anything that allows you to spark your creativity can suffice if you’re short on time. Step 4: Pick Your Style As many different poems as there are, there are almost an equal number of styles in which they are written. There are traditional forms, modern, post modern, and many more. You can work on fitting your rough draft poem into one of these many forms, or you can go with no form at all. The benefit of working on an art form is that there are no hard and fast rules on what the end product must look like. Perhaps you’d like to try your hand at penning your vows in the form of a Shakespearean sonnet. Or, to go a completely different route, maybe “experimental” is right up your alley. No matter what you choose, just make sure it fits your style. After all, personalizing your wedding vows means just that – they should be personal, not forced to fit into a style that just isn’t “you.”
Conquering Your Fears Since this is such a unique and central moment to your romantic life, you’re probably wondering how it is that you’ll make the experience better than that 10th grade public-speaking assignment where you blanked out halfway through and fainted in front of all of your peers. Begin by telling yourself that it is perfectly natural to feel nervous when speaking in public. Moreover, not everyone is born with perfect public-speaking skills that accurately demonstrate what they feel in their hearts. However, fortunately for the majority of us, these things can be learned. Of course, being well-prepared and armed with wedding vows you know are the absolute best they could possibly be is one of the easiest ways to overcome these fears. How do I know? Because the home-study course I put together, The Ultimate Wedding Vow Toolkit, has helped hundreds of couples take the fear out of their wedding ceremony by giving them the tools they need to write truly amazing wedding vows. You can find out more about the kit at http://www.weddingvowtoolkit.com. But beyond that, when you think logically about each of these fears, you’ll realize there is nothing that cannot be overcome with a bit of care, technique, and practice. Let’s take a realistic look at these five incredibly common worries. In a few minutes, you’ll see that none of them are likely to spoil your ceremony.
Common Fear #1: Freezing Up This is a direct result of being excessively nervous. Therefore, it’s important to come up with some calming techniques that will help you to keep cool. It’s only natural to be a bit nervous. In fact, the added rush from being a little on the anxious side can actually help you to speak better and with added feeling. The best technique that you can give yourself is breathing. Most often, when we are overly frightened, we either breathe much too quickly or we hold our breath. Therefore, as you’re keeping yourself calm, concentrate on breathing smoothly, neither too fast or too slow, but regularly, in through your nose and out through your mouth. Practice a few times in advance, especially in other situations that you’ve found a bit stressful in the past. You’ll be surprised at what an enormous difference something as simple as breathing can do for you.
Common Fear #2: Going Blank This is another trick played by your overly-nervous brain. To stop yourself from becoming so nervous that you go blank, or even to remove any fear that you may go blank, bring a “backup” copy of your wedding vows on cue cards that you can slip into your pocket. Make sure they are very crisp and neat looking so that you won’t hesitate to use them if you have to, and write clearly on them so that you won’t get stuck due to sloppiness. Common Fear #3: Blushing, Dry Mouth, and Shaking. These are extremely common physical responses to being nervous and having to perform in front of others. However, even if they do begin to occur, you can bring yourself to a calmer state where these physical symptoms will begin to fade. Try to ignore blushing and shaking as much as possible and just concentrate on your vows and how much you love the person to whom you are making those vows. With regards to dry mouth, drink lots of water beforehand, and try not to think about it. As long as you concentrate on what you’re doing, instead of the fact that you are blushing, shaking, or have a dry mouth, they will actually begin to resolve themselves quite quickly.
Common Fear #4: Having Someone Heckle This is a common fear, but it simply doesn’t happen at weddings. Remind yourself that everyone there with you is hoping the very best for you and your future spouse. They are all nervous right along with you and wouldn’t dream of saying anything but best wishes for your future together. The closest they will come to “heckling” is sending a mental prayer to provide you the strength and the courage to continue so that you may enjoy long and happy lives together. Common Fear #5: Being Judged The people attending your wedding are all people who know you, like or love you, and who wish you the very best. They know how much adrenaline is running through your system as you say your wedding vows, and wouldn’t judge you at a time like that; except to think about how well suited you are to the love of your life. The Compatibility Test is designed for those who are seriously evaluating their relationships and the results are a fair and real indicator of a couple's compatibility.
Penis Advantage Are you really happy with your penis size. Enlarge your penis 1 - 4 inches, FAST, SAFE, REAL! You are just a few minutes away from learning the ONLY method that will guarantee you the 1 - 4 extra inches you have always wanted! Follow this link to see why this program makes others look downright embarrassing! From Commitment Phobe to a Proposal! - A strategic ten-step plan to help get your commitmentphobic partner to make a commitment - to YOU! Get Your Partner Back in YOUR Arms - where they belong! Stop or undo your break up! Learn how... Find out WHY Women Dump Men - don't repeat the same mistakes with your next partner! Break ups hurt. Stop the pain here! Amazing insights into healing broken hearts. The real truth about why you stay attached to a partner with commitment phobia! The REAL Reasons Why Women Cheat - it may not be what you think! Awesome insights for both men and women!!!!! Get an eBook Library on YOUR computer right now! For paper books we have bookshelves, but for ebooks? Nothing. Until now. Never lose an eBook again!
|
Relationship Advice For Men | Relationship Advice For Women | Relationship Advice Links | Lifted Hearts Network
Don't have time to read the whole
website now? Download this site right to your
desktop and read the articles at your convenience, offline!
Would you like to have a site like this? Lease a
fully functional, ready-made relationship-advice website from us! You don't
need to know anything about owning a website... we build it all and host
it ourselves. All you have to do is tell your friends about your new site
and send them there! Your site is affiliate ready and setup to start earning
you money almost instantly! Click here for more
information!
COPYRIGHT 2005 LIFTED HEARTS NETWORK.
ALL RIGHTS RESERVED!
The Bachelorette Party -
If
you're dreaming of having the perfect wedding, but don't think you have the
knowledge or time to plan it-or the cash to pay for it-then let me share
with you…